new-mom-itis

There's this thing going about.  If you have a child or are expecting your first, you probably caught it without even knowing.  New-mom-itis usually sets in around the middle of the second trimester, sometimes sooner, and manifests itself with unrealistic parenting expectations and verbal outbursts such as these:
"My baby will sleep X hours every night."
"I will ALWAYS use a nursing cover."
"My child will never do/eat/say that!"
"I don't want the baby to get too attached to me."
"My child will always sleep in a crib and never come into my bed!"
"I'm going to TRY to breastfeed"
"I'm going to breastfeed, but Daddy needs to bond too, so he'll give bottles every night."
"I'm going to let Daddy formula feed at night so the baby will sleep longer.  I'll need a break."
"My mom said to start putting rice cereal in the baby's bottle from birth to make him sleep longer.  She did it for me and I turned out fine."
"We will NEVER use a pacifier"
"My child will be fully potty trained before his second birthday."
"My child will have perfect table manners and always use a spoon."
"My baby will learn to self-soothe and will sleep through the night from birth."
"My house will be spotless."
"We're going to do everything we used to do.  The baby will fit right into our lifestyle."
"I'm going to give my baby a bath every night."
"Bald babies are ugly.  Mine will have hair.  I know it because I have heartburn."
"My baby won't have a bald spot on the back of his head.  Only neglected babies have bald spots."
"Babies who cry are just being manipulative."

The only known treatment for new-mom-itis is exposure to reality.  For some victims, the disorder is gone before it is noticed.  For others, it lasts for several years.  I was a victim of new-mom-itis.  Many people close to me have been affected by this disorder.  The most we can do is have hope that we can find a cure for new-mom-itis.

Kaiya was my cure for new-mom-itis.

Special thanks to fellow blogger Mama.