My dogs are trying to kill me.

I have two dogs.  Pugsley is a 13 year old poodle and Alcide is a 3 year old Shepherd/Husky shelter mutt.  I think they're out to get me.  I'm always tripping over them.  It's like they see me coming with an armful of stuff and they decide to play dead on the floor so I'll trip.

This weekend, we were visiting relatives and about to leave to go home.  Pugsley jumped in the car and I thought the kids had let him out.  I also thought that my husband, Blue, had taken the keys out of the car.  I thought wrong.  I headed out to the car with my things, noticed that the dog was in the car, and saw him get excited.  He was so happy to see me that he jumped right onto the lock button. 

So what did I do?  I tried for over two hours to get him out.  I tried to coax him over to press the unlock button.  I tried using a coat hanger.  Somewhere in there, I called 911, hoping that since an animal was in danger, they would help.  They sent out animal control and later, an officer.  Neither one had any idea how to unlock a car door, so I called a locksmith who had it open in 3 minutes.  By then, my husband had to get home with his animals, so he had gone home and we had decided to stay the night so I could avoid driving 90 minutes in the dark with 3 cranky kids and 2 dogs.

Within 30 minutes, we noticed that no one had seen Alcide.  The gate was open.  I panicked.  We ran in different directions, checked under beds, tables, in closets, and I ran down the street in both directions.  I chased a deer, believing it was him.

Then my brother in law came outside and told me he'd found him.  Alcide looked at me and I swear he gave me the most mischievous dog smile I've ever seen.